Time Flies

Oh, man does it ever fly with a seven month old! Kenny is now rolling, rolling, rolling! It is amazing to see him learn new things every day. Today he picked up something with his thumb and pointer finger. It was so cool.

It has been sooo hot here lately. It definitely makes me want to go waterskiing! I can't wait to feel the wind in my face and feel the cold water the first time I jump in to ski!

That's about it for what's going on here in old Idaho. Except for the fact that I bbq'd tonight and it was delicious!

I'll write more when I'm not completely exhausted!

Sad Sad Sad

All I can watch on tv is Virginia Tech. I am so sad about that situation. More information is added to the story every minute it seems like. One thing I wonder about...I was listening to the radio and someone brought this up and I wonder if they are right...if the campus WAS able to lock down after the first shooting, as many people are posing as a possibility that lives would have been saved that way, wouldn't the shooter have just instead killed the people in his dorm instead of the student in Norris Hall? Also, in a way, I'm not surprised that an English major would leave an 1800 word manifesto before he committed the absolutely horrible thing he did. This whole situation is just sooo disturbing. I have been in constant prayer for the families affected, the campus, the students, the killer's family, and for God to intervene in the people's lives that need it who may be on the path to doing something like this in the future. I know the killer's name. I just can't bring myself to actually type it.

It makes me fearful--or rather extremely prayerful--of the world that Kenny is growing up in where schools are not such a safe place anymore. Teachers are targets...I just pray that God watches over Kenny as he grows up. I can't imagine what the parents are going through who just lost their child in this tragedy. To them, these college students are their babies that they held and rocked to sleep, that they calmed their tears in the night, that they loving cared for when they were sick, that they dreamed with about their future, that they missed when they went away to college...oh, it's just so so so sad.

Thankful

Brandon has a very scary thing happen to him on Thursday. Around 8:30 he was working on my car and the radiator hose broke after he had given it a test drive right as he was leaning over to check something out. He came in the house and said my name in a panicky way and I saw him holding his face. He said he had hot anti freeze all over him. Me not knowing what the compostion of anti freeze was afraid to look at him because I thought it was like battery acid and I thought it might be melting his face like acid and I was so afraid. I didn't know how I was going to be able to look at him and not freak him out or scream or something else. He went to the sink and started washing off his face, rinsing his mouth out and I looked to see how bad it was--his face was red from burns but not melting like I thought it might. We continued to rinse it, he went to the tub to get more water flow, and then he called his dad. Jerry came over, took Bran to the hospital, and I stayed here with Kenny. It was so scary. It was right around his left eye. The doctors were afraid he might have damaged it. God certainly protected him then--he no protective eye wear on but he has no damage to his eye. He's got a big blister above his eyebrow and redness still around his eye but he looks so good. I think about what could have happened (him losing his sight, suffering 3rd degree burns that would scar) and realize he's okay and I am so thankful.

It's a case of Murphy's Law in action...

More Random Thoughts

Two things I can't stop thinking about today...

Ever since Anna Nicole died I've been following the story about her daughter Dannielynn. For some reason she has just captured my heart. I have prayed for this little baby and I don't even know her. I just feel so bad for her losing her mother and now it looks like she losing the only father she's ever known. I feel bad for Howard K Stern too. He's lost his love and now his daughter. It's just a sad situation all around. I don't know where the best place is for this child. I just pray that God watches out for her. Maybe I feel an attachment to her because she's the same age as Kenny and I think about how helpless he is...

I'm also sad about the Virginia Tech shooting that happened today. They say there's more fatalities than at Columbine. I'm sad about someone who thinks a solution is to kill people. I'm sad for the people that were just going about another day on campus who lost their life. I'm sad for their families. I'm sad.

Just A Quick Minute

Kenny enjoyed his first Easter and Easter egg hunt. We went to Heather's after worship Sunday morning and had a wonderful dinner and then headed outside (where it was a tad brisk) and we all watched Rylee hunt eggs. I carried Kenny and he was able to grab two eggs. Rylee was very helpful and carried Kenny's basket and even shared her eggs with him! He had his first outsdie sing in Rylee's bucket swing and he loved it.

Well, my minute is over!

Feed Me!

Today has been sort of brutal. Kenny woke up at 5:30 this morning starving!! Normally that wouldn't be too bad (even though he sleeps through the night and his normal wake up time is 8am) but yesterday I had my first caffeinated drink in about 4 months (I just wanted a vanilla coke so bad) and I couldn't go to sleep until after 1am. So he ate for a while, fell back asleep, woke up in another hour hungry again, fed him again, then I took a short nap while he watched baby einstein, and then he was starving again, so it was time for cereal. He's been eating rice cereal for about three weeks now and I try to be neat and not get it all over him when I feed him, but today was all about getting him fed. I couldn't shove it in fast enough today! For a picture of what he looked like when we were done, go to the next post.

By the way, he's also eating as I'm writing this post. It's only 10:30am.

So We Had A Little Mess To Clean Up...

Here We Go Again!

Well, with summer right around the corner--and waterski season and swimsuits--I have once again started my daily routine of working out. Today is day 4 and I feel so great and proud of myself. The only thing is that it seems that after completing week 3 something always happens and I'm not able to work out for a few weeks and then I feel like I'm starting all over again. Last time I started my daily routine and I was set to start week four I got really sick for a week and half and then was recovering for another week...then Kenny got sick and I don't know what happened after that. So time has passed and here I am...starting again. The program I'm doing is a six week one so I just hope I can stay well and finish it. I've never finished it because something ALWAYS happens. Always at week four something happens. I'm scared of week four!

I just visited the website (wwww.beachbody.com) and I think if I make it all the way through I'll get myself a tank top. A little reward?

Brandon and I were talking the other night and he asked me what I would like to do for vacation this year. I am hoping to make it to California in the summertime to visit family and friends and show off Kenny but that would be without Bran...Bran only gets the week off between Christmas and New Year's every year and one more week off whenever he'd like to take it sooo...I'm not really used to the idea of a big vacation. Growing up, my family and I always went camping but that's not "vacation". "Vacation" is what the Brady Bunch did when they went to the Grand Canyon or Hawaii. Well, now I'm going to do it too. Bran suggested going to Glacier National Park and I think that's an awesome idea. I've never been there before and it looks incredible. It's called the Switzerland of...North America (I think). We would probably go up through Yellowstone (a place I adore) and then travel home through northern Idaho (which I've never seen but he has since he went to school in Moscow for one year). He's going to go pick up the trailer from my parents house tomorrow so we can get it all ready to go for all of our summertime fun. I hope it can make it to Glacier!

We also have on the agenda going to Featherville again this year--it's pretty much a given every year with his family over Memorial Day weekend that they will go up there. The guys dirt bike to their hearts content and we're camped by a river so I'm happy too. It will be our first official camping trip with a baby. I know Kenny will be just fine though. He's so easy going. Today we went all over town (getting a set of dishes from Bran's grandma's friend, visiting Daddy at work, shopping for clothes) and he was so good. He's such a joy!

Saturday we went out to my parents house and my dad took some awesome pictures of Kenny. I'm going to try to post them...

Well, I did one! It takes about 6 minutes to load with dial up so I think one is good for now

Can't Sleep

I don't know why but I just can't sleep tonight. Maybe it's because of daylight savings...I don't know. I took a shower to help me settle down. I smell better but still not ready to sleep. I've tried to shut my mind off but I just can't...I thought maybe writing a bit would help ease my alertness.

Today was such a good day. I took Kenny to the doctor today to make sure he was okay. Yesterday he was still very croupy sounding and so today I took him in. I called several people yesterday night to ask them to specifically pray for Kenny (even though we put him on the prayer list Sunday and people were praying for him) because I was really worried. Prayers were answered with a yes for Kenny to improve because today has been significantly better. He was so good at the doctor's office. We came home and I strapped on my Snugli and we cleaned the house (vacuuming and everything!) and then he sat in his bouncy chair in the kitchen with me as I made dinner and we sang songs and he was just so content. We are trying to transition him into going to his bedroom and then going to sleep instead of being asleep beforehand and tonight was a step in the right direction. I took him to his room when he showed signs of being sleepy and laid him down with his awesome mobile going--he fussed a bit when I left so I came back, held him a bit then left again. He fussed a little more this time, I held him again, he fell asleep and that was it. I think he and I have a good relationship.

I was thinking in the shower (such a good place to think!) about if someone asked me why I married Brandon what I would say was that one thing that set him apart from everyone else. Why was I thinking that? I don't know...I guess because he fixed our garbage disposal tonight and it made me think about all the things he does for us (me, Kenny, our household) that I just don't have to worry about...but him fixing things isn't what I would say is why I married him! I think it would have to be that he is the most trustworthy man I have ever met--he's trustworthy with me, my life, my son...I NEVER worry about him when we're apart from each other (like that he's checking out other girls or whatever). I had trusted so many guys in my past that didn't deserve trust at all--of course I also didn't know how to keep and hold myself and my emotions back either until I was like, 30! so part or all of the blame lies at my doorstep. I watched a Dr. Phil show today where the guy was saying that all men cheat or something along those lines, married or not. Dr. Phil totally called this guy out though and was like, uh, no, that's not the way it is when you're married. But before Brandon I might have believed something like that to be true because of the bad choices I made with my own emotions--like getting involved way too quickly emotionally with someone before there was a commitment made and then FEELING as if they were cheating on me (when in reality we weren't together so they could do what they wanted and so could've I had I understood that concept). And of course there were the flat out liars I dated who could look me straight in the face and lie to me--and I would believe them! That was my own stupidity right there. That Dr. Phil guy was just still a player that didn't need to be married and thought he was pretty hot stuff.

Oh when I look back on some of the stupid ways I acted and so much wasted emotion and so much drama I created because I was emotionally attached way too soon. If I have a daughter I hope I can teach her not to do that. I'm sure my mom tried to teach me but I didn't listen. I had always wanted to have that storybook whirlwind romance where you meet and fall in love right away and that's it but even in that situation you have to hold back some! I was so that girl in How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days for sooo long. I just want to gag when I think of some of the ways I acted! Who was that psycho?

I think I feel better now. Maybe I can sleep now.

Can You Feel It?

Spring is definitely in the air. Today I have the doors and windows open and fresh air is streaming through the house. It smells so good. Last night when I went to evening services I wore a tshirt and took my jacket with me "just in case". Needed it for afterwards. We have the sunroof open on the XT and it is a glorious feeling. Wal-mart has all of their gardening stuff out and it smells so good in the gardening section. I didn't used to be into the whole flower thing but now I can't wait to put out some hanging pots. And now that I stay at home maybe I can keep up with all the dead heading that has to be done! Usually I'm pretty good for a few weeks and then I just get too busy and too overwhelmed and--they die.

And if spring is just around the corner then the most wonderful time of the year is almost here. No, not Christmas--waterski season!!! Last year I didn't get to waterski at all because I was pregnant so this year I am going to ski myself out! Anytime and all the time. Get ready, Lucky Peak, cuz here I came. We bought a new to us ski boat last year too so I can't wait to try it out. The one thing I have to really concentrate on for the next couple of months is getting myself in shape. I lost most of my baby weight but still have ten pounds to go and ten pounds can really make a difference when you're skiing--I don't want to get tired too soon! Plus, bathing suits are not forgiving. And I'll be in one a lot. Video tapes, here I come. I use the BeachBody.com Slim in 6 tapes and I love them. I also have Power 90. I like both of them. Maybe this time I'll take a pic of my pre work out body so I can see the difference and maybe send it in to them...I love the transformation stories. I don't know how to make a link to their website but they are great and anyone reading this should go check it out. I could spend hours looking at all those awesome stories. They definitely inspire me....

Well, Kenny is needing my attention so here I go...

Random Thought on a Friday Night

Well, Kenny is officially sick--his first sickness. He's not been feeling well, coughing, sneezing...so I took him the doctor yesterday and he has "croup". Normally, a person would just let the "croup" run it's course and you'd be done with it. For a 5 1/2 month old though things are different. He has to take a five day round of steroids to help the inflammation in his airway go away. If it doesn't get better after the steroids, then you talk about hospital stays. Scary. I found out that Brandon was in the hospital about a week with "croup" when he was six months old. Scary. I hope those steroids know what they're doing!

Other than that, he's actually been quite happy and a joy to be around (as always). Perhaps a little more needy, but then again so am I when I'm sick. I'm bummed because we were supposed to hang out with our friends Brian and Wendy and their little girl Megan tonight and my old chilihead friend Kari and her husband tomorrow night--we cancelled both things. Doctor says to keep him in for a while since he might get another kid sick or catch something from someone else. This is the kind of thing that I thought would bug the heck out of me as a parent before I was one but now that I am one...it's just what you do. And that's okay. I'd rather him be okay than do all the stuff I would do if I didn't have him. I'm kinda sick too so it's probably better for everyone's health that we all stay home.

The weather has been AWESOME here lately--mostly 60s which in Idaho is practically t shirt weather. I don't even wear a coat anymore when it's that warm outside! Being from the Bay Area when I first moved here I would have been in a jacket, had my gloves, hat, and scarf on...and probably STILL been cold. Idahoans would look at me so crazy when I was dressed like that and they were in shorts and a t shirt. In all fairness, I would look at them crazy too because I was so cold I couldn't imagine wearing that.

I miss the Bay Area. Well, I miss what it used to be when I was growing up. I miss the way my family used to be when both sets of my grandparents lived within 15 minutes, all of my cousins were close, we would see our family all of the time for holidays, birthdays...or no reason at all, just because we could. Now we're so far away...and that time is long ago. When I go down though, and I breath in the fresh salty air and feel the wonderful breeze on my face it's like no time has passed. Everyone I love is still alive and we all live close to each other. I'm still that little kid who's rollerskating back and forth between houses with my best friend Karen, Top Ramen is my lunch of choice, it's safe to walk back and forth to school, when I open my Nana's kitchen door a wonderful warmth wafts in my face and hear the laughter of my family trailing through the house to greet me (and a piece of candy from the candy dish!), my Mama still lives next to Taco Bell and I always know she'll make me a peanut butter and honey sandwich if I want it, I'm all ready to play Indiana Jones at my cousin's house, or ready to play in the canal at my other cousin's house, I can still meet my family at the Hickory Pit Sunday afternoon...but I love Idaho...and Kenny will now be making those memories to look back on...weird to think about that! I hope his school years are as full and wonderful as mine were even though he won't get to ride BART for a field trip, go to San Francisco for a piece of Blondie's Pizza as you're walking around the city after going to a play or an opera or a museum or an art gallery or Golden Gate Park, go to the Oakland Zoo, go to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, go the bay to collect water and then take it back to school to look at it under a microscope, go to Coyote Hills....and that's just to name a few! I'm not saying there's not stuff to do in Idaho--there is and it's great--but there's something magical about the Bay Area.

Brandon's been working so hard lately. I probably should go spend some time with him right now. Last week he didn't come home until 8, 9, or even 10pm...tonight he came home early so I should take advantage! We had Papa Murphy's pizza and it was delicious!

Relaxing

Well, the last week has been a whirlwind! I threw a baby shower for my sister in law here at the house Saturday morning and the week before was all about getting ready for that day. I was able to do some things that I had wanted to get done since Kenny was born to make the house look nice (because my mom came over and helped me--couldn't have done it without her help) and I was so proud of the way the house looked and how the shower went...I love to entertain and decorate for entertaining so the last week, although at times stressful because I was putting pressure on myself, was really fun. And it was nice getting to spend that extra time with my mom and she enjoyed the extra time with Kenny.

Kenny is just so awesome. ican't believe he's already 5 months now. I told Brandon the other day that before Kenny two months of my life would go by and nothing would change but now with Kenny two months go by and he looks and acts so different--two months is huge in his life. It is now huge in mine too. It is so hard at times knowing how quickly this all will pass and people tell me that it will all the time. I look at them, know I'm where they were 20 years ago, and know that 20 years will pass incredibly fast and I will be the one saying to the young mother how fast time will fly. I think about being a grandmother and loving the new child so much and not getting to be with it all the time...it not knowing me as well as it knows it's parents and wanting it to know me...even more so I think about being the great grandparent and being that much more removed...if I live that long. Well, I'm 36...if my kid had a kid at 20 (which there was no way that would have happened in my life!) I'd be 56 and then if that kid had a kid 20 years later I'd be 76. I guess I could possibly live that long. But who's to say they would have a family that quickly. I was a super flake at 20. I was a super flake at 30 if we're being honest. I think I wanted to have a baby when I was 20 but knowing how much work it is and how happy I am that I had a chance to mature and work some things out of my system, and experience life and graduate from college...I would tell my 20 year old self to wait. And to be married that young? My 20 year old self couldn't have handled it!

Jill came and visited us not this last weekend but the weekend before and she told us she is going to have a baby! I had all the maternity clothes packed up from Heather and had added my little amount I bought to the mix and was going to give that back to Heather but when Jill gave us the news I took over to her and she crammed all of it into her suitcases and they went with her off to Colorado! it was a lot of clothes--she was so excited. She is so excited about her baby. She's due the same time the doctor thought I was due (when they thought I was two weeks behind what Bran and I knew I was)so in early October we'll have another addition. I can't believe that Kenny will be a year old when that baby comes...so strange.

Have I mentioned how cool he is? He laughs now and is developing his personality and is exploring his world through touch and it so amazing to see him learn. last night at Brock and Alisha's he was making noises I'd never heard before! He was so excited to be around the other kids and trying to communicate with them--he really loves his cousin. He loves Rylee too. He made a noise at church while Heather was holding him to get Bran's attention! He wasn't paying attention to him and he wanted him to so Kenny busted out with this funny noise.

I can't believe I'm that mom who talks about her kids all the time. I am educated! I do read! I watch movies! I can talk about other things! I do stuff! I love to get out and do things like waterski...but Kenny is just so great...I can't help myself...I guess all those years I've been around parents wondering if they could talk about anything else the answer is yes, they could talk about something else...but what was cooler than the amazing things their kids were doing? Now I know that nothing else is that cool :)

The First One

Well, this is my first post. I have so many things to say but don't know where to start. I decided to give this blogging thing a try because I wanted to keep a diary of things that are happening in my life right now...it seems to be going so quickly...I can't hold onto the moments long enough. I had my first child, Kenneth Bryan (we call him Kenny), on September 20th of last year (on our 3 year wedding anniversary!) and ever since then I feel as if time has kicked into fast forward. Where has four and half months of my life gone? How can my son already be that old? People say they remember when their kids were this young and I can see myself years from now looking back on this time and saying the same thing. I can still remember when Kenny was only a week old, looking at him and thinking, "I'll blink my eyes and this will be just a memory..." and now it is--just a memory. A wonderful memory, yes, but if four months can go by so quickly what about 4 years? What about 40 years? That's where the title of my blog came from because as soon as I finish this blog it will become the past--it will be a "Remember When?" Even in just these few short months with Kenny I already have so many "Remember When?"s with him...I remember when he was born, when I first saw his face, when he first smiled, when we went out of the house for the first time together--alone, when he laughed out loud for the first time...and I can't wait for the ones to come like first steps and first words. There's a very sweet song by Allen Jackson that talks about remembering when...like when 30 seemed so old...how true is that?

Life is so very precious. Every day is such a wonderful gift. Every breath is special.

I think I'm going to like this blogging thing...